real.faith blog

Where could I go to escape from you? Where could I get away from your presence?
If I went up to heaven, you would be there; if I lay down in the world of the dead, you would be there.
If I flew away beyond the east or lived in the farthest place in the west, you would be there to lead me, you would be there to help me.
I could ask the darkness to hide me or the light around me to turn into night, but even darkness is not dark for you, and the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are the same to you.
-Psalm 139:7-12

I’m not ashamed to admit it. I try to run from God.

I love God’s church, and I know I’m supposed to love the people of God, but too frequently, I find myself running from both— and in doing so, I run from Him. I run from reading my Bible. My growing Internet addiction and desire to be entertained by the flickering of my TV screen are simply more appealing to me.

I also run from prayer. I have a hard enough time trusting people, let alone trusting a God I can’t see. Praying, in my view, is a dangerous sport. If I ask for patience, I might just be given a situation that will build patience. If I ask to have a closer relationship with God, I figure God might just eliminate some human relationships in a painful and unpleasant way to get me there—or I might find myself with a rather unsavory illness that will make my relationship with God all the more important.

Yet— despite all of my attempts to escape— there stands a carpenter from Nazareth. Whatever road I run down, regardless of which direction I turn, that old Galilean beckons me. “Where are you going?” He says. He puts His hand on my shoulder and leads me back, “Come with me, and learn my love. Learn to put your Trust in Me.”

Despite my worries and my lack of faith. In spite of my struggles with whether or not God is really good, without regard to any of my doubts, Christ finds me and brings me back. I have nowhere to run and nowhere to hide, and that is a good thing, because the choices I make when I try to escape the grace of God are just bad for me. What I think is a good move or a wise choice—often causes me ten times more pain than if I stayed put and let God lead.

I’m going to take a break from my normal ranting and grumbling. For the next few days I will set aside my usual criticisms and ponderings and reflect on one of the most beautiful word pictures found in the Bible.

Not to sound clichéd but the next few blogs are more for me than for anyone who may be reading. I want to spend some time looking closely at Psalm 139, which—more than any other passage I can think of—describes how deeply God loves His people.

We live in a society of unfaithful marriages, throw-away relationships and shallow friendships. I don’t know about you, but it seems like every time I turn around I’m losing a friend, meeting an enemy or struggling to know who I can trust.

This song written by King David thousands of years ago tells of the love of a God who doesn’t change. The one being in all the universe who knows me completely… The only One who knows my motives, will not second guess me and will never have an inaccurate perception of me.

This is the song of a God who knows me better than I know myself and who sees my strengths and weaknesses—and doesn’t run or turn away. He is the only One capable of loving me unconditionally. So, for the next few posts, I invite you to meditate with me on this old Psalm. Some might call it over-used, but I know I can’t hear of God’s love enough.

To start, I’ll post the Psalm in its entirety. In the posts that follow, we will look at each passage together and reflect on this unshakeable and undeserved love the Father has for us.

Oh Lord, you have searched me
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, Oh Lord.
You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"
even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
How precious to me are your thoughts, Oh God!
How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.
If only you would slay the wicked, Oh God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
Do I not hate those who hate you, Oh Lord,
and abhor those who rise up against you?
I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
Search me, Oh God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

When they aren’t too cheesy—and even sometimes when they are—I like to watch vignettes from churches. This one, from Central Christian Church in Las Vegas, shows church members’ testimonies of their experiences at other churches where they felt judged when they should have been loved. Take a look:

These stories are a far cry from what followers of Christ are supposed to be known for. We are supposed to be known by our love for one another, not our judgment and condemnation of others. What’s your story? Positive or negative, I’d love to hear what you have to say about your experience with churches. Were you judged when you should have been loved? Did you ever find a church where you were loved and welcomed as part of a family?