Prayer of the Misguided
May4
Lord Jay-sus,
We thank you for our guns,
for this big bucket of KFC,
for the new Wal-Mart that opened up over yonder,
and for the liquor store we runned outta town.
We rejoice that you have brought the Swine Flu
as judgment on the illegal immigrants who are stealing all our jobs.
We thank you for Sarah Palin, the next president of this great land.
We thank you for dying on the cross so that we could live in this country.
We ask for your condemnation on all those wretched sinners.
Please help us protect ourselves against our enemies.
Amen.
…and Jesus wept.
